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MAKE YOUR PAST GLORIOUS

BEING IN THE PRESENT

” We regret for our not so pleasant past as we fail to make it glorious. You don’t need a physical time machine. ”

                                   – Anonymous

Ohh No…. It should not have happened. I have lost my sleep and sweet dreams of childhood. Any such thought coming to your mind when you are already at an advanced stage in your life? No more worry now. I have a full proof solution for all.

You may find this blog title a laughing stuff at first sight. What is this all about? It this possible? You will find people easily who guide you like ‘just forget it’. Why do you want to remember something painful to you? Never ever fall to this mind game played by others. I don’t say they are not your well wishers and not asking you to ignore them.

They just have a different perspective to life as per their experience. You are not here to live their life. When shall you be able to lead your life if you entertain all these advice? Listen to your heart when you are in between a constant battle of your heart and mind.

I have a very simple question for you. Why is something painful to you and why do you get hurt easily? You can easily find the answer yourself. If you ask the same to me my answer will talk more about our mindset. Actually it’s because when we do things wrong and never because of the wrong doings by others. You have a great brain and a big heart. So, use it and discover life  in all it’s abundance full of  surprises and happiness.

We all can do it all living at our present. There is absolutely nothing to regret about or escape from. Our mind is such a big time machine. It’s cowardice to escape and we should never build such a plan in mind. To achieve this feat we need to start living life with honesty and not that of crooks.

All of us has huge storage of power and inner potential. Only very few of us recognise this fact and all they lack is the will power. Will power develops better when we think and act with our own mind and not that of others. Listen to your heart when you are in constant battle between your heart and mind.

I virtually forgot few past incidents that always resided in the memory of the subconscious mind. The decision was made in mind as that misguided me constantly telling me you must forget all these bad moments in life. I fell to the trap and did all I would have never done should I have listened to my heart.
I don’t regret but I feel like ohh my god… What a big blunder I committed as i could not bring much goodness to myself and that of others.

Yes, it’s my own deeds and never that of others. You can turn the table either in favour of you or against it by simple but powerful thoughts and unconditional acceptance.

When we live in solitude our mind becomes hyper creative full of thoughts when we revisit our past. No one there to disturb and you are on your own. Few hours of solitude daily may be good for a creative mind but too long a period could be like a prolonged illness. We need to be at a caution side in our calculations how much time we want to devote for each activity.

Many a times we face this question asked by our mind. Shall I make it, break it or simply escape. Sometimes we don’t gather enough courage to face a situation and the weaker zone of our mind guides us to escape. Is that the need for any life challenging situation? Never a good idea.

I am narrating an example. Can you face a person and look straight into the eyes whom you hurt knowingly? Imagine such a situation in your past. The ego mind may misguide you and tell you like “no no.. don’t worry too much. What you did is correct only and this person doesn’t deserve your attention”. You may escape successfully for some time listening to your mind but you can’t retain this pleasure for a lifetime.

We should not blame our heart, mind or any other entity unable to meet well a difficult situation in life. We don’t always have the same level of maturity and we grow as we learn better.  On a humane side this is quite acceptable as i feel. This learning hardly comes from text books. We must explore life to the fullest if we want to learn and understand ourselves better.

We must accept what we did wrong. Never ever try to cover up your faults citing what others doing as wrong. This will be cheating our own self. If this is true i must accept my own faults and make corrections as required. It is because my actions may not only cause unpleasant situations for myself but there is a great probability it can have adverse effect on others. I must bridge the communication gap in due time. We may find it easy to escape our present environment or this world but can never escape our own soul (what we all term as ‘zameer’ or ‘atma ki aawaz’ in the Indian context).

Do your best to find your loved ones missing now for some reason and talk to them. You may create an event to do all this like at a public function or any other public place with fresh air. Self acceptance is the key. We fail to accept our past as we fail to accept ourselves. We fail to accept ourselves most of the time because of our false ego that misguides and hurt us. We are always concerned about our reputation and social stature. Our mind gets bugged down with a fear what will happen if people come to know this.

We can never erase our scars completely unless we accept ourselves fully without any condition. Surrender yourself completely to the almighty and you can build that power. Ego will vanish when we start thinking about others. This is my personal experience and you may say it an accident.

We are responsible either for our success or failure. Why regret for unpleasant life events of our past when we can do so much good at our present.

There is no need to forget our hard past. This is an escapist attitude. It is because what we are today, our present strengths and weaknesses has been shaped by lessons learned from our past. We can do better if we are a good learner.

I don’t want to indulge with my past anymore for any bad experience and I don’t want to forget as well. It is because no experience is painful but a learning opportunity. Every situation can be faced and let’s consider our past experiences as case studies. I only have sweet memories now.
I am completely at peace and so can you.

Few suggestions as follows for a better living and thinking…

– Live in the present
– Admit your mistakes
– Accept yourself and others
– Remove all toxic elements from your life that cause you think negative time and again
– Stop conducting too much experimentation on yourself and others for which you can’t foresee the future or predict an outcome
– Accept Murphy’s law
– Talk to people as often and spend time with your loved ones
– Spend time with kids and learn simplicity from them as they are the purest souls
– Retain a strong memory and recall as you need

Let me know from your experience how you feel we can do well at our present and minimise the negative impacts of our past.

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UNDERSTANDING VALUES

Some people claim that they drive themselves by values and for some its there understanding, but the fact is that most of them don’t really understand values to its correct meaning. When I ask them about Indian value system they find it difficult and try to escape the situation. Once I had a discussion with an infosys guy while roaming around in a park in Bangalore on a weekend. I asked him, what do you mean by driven by values? His immediate reply was I could not get you properly, can you please explain it? Then I asked have you ever noticed your company punch line? Your company punch line shows “powered by intellect, driven by values”. He replied immediately, oh yeah you are talking about that. Then he tried to change the topic moving to some other discussion. I allowed him to do that. Again after some time when I found that the person is now comfortable talking to me, I came back to the original topic our discussion.

At that point of time the person felt miserable and when he found there is no way to escape, he started talking on that. He explained it correctly to some extent according to my perception only the first part of it that is “powered by intellect”. He had no clue about “driven by values”. Then he told I don’t remember that now, it must have some mention in our company website somewhere. I will check and tell you. Then I told him don’t worry it’s not a big issue, visit us some time we will have more discussion. I finished our discussion with a thank you note and I gave him my company business card before leaving that place.

He was not the wrong person whom I had interaction with. Let’s analyze and understand the problem here if any. What he explained was his understanding. Sometime we neglect minute details about something in our analysis as we fell that is less important for us and we have many big issues in life to confront with. This kind of negligence can create humiliating situation for us in every sphere of life. In this particular case the person must have a feeling in him that he could not represent his company well when it was most needed. Should I blame infosys management for what there employees know and what they not about there company? No, I can’t, because I don’t know there history. Is there any flaw in there administration? I can’t say. We can’t blame any management if there employees fail to meet the minimum required expectation. For a single person I can’t blame the entire management. Yes it’s required to find out the root cause and take the corrective action to prevent further damage.

It’s not enough to create big banners and generate eye catching punch lines for advertisement. What if we don’t understand that? Yes with this it is possible to bring more recognition outside and do a good business what we usually look out for. But we can never build a clean society unless we understand values to its correct meaning. We need to inculcate that into practice in our personal lives. I can say that we understand values and we follow that in practice too. So I feel like we are the best in this area where people understand and realize the importance of value system rather than claiming it which is more important according to my understanding.

Is our value system extinct under western influence or just in danger like the tiger species? If it’s true can we revive our old value system? What can we do about that? I have not provided any solution to any problem here. We need to come up with our own problem and solution and also its desired to share that with others for better understanding. These are all still open for discussion for everybody to find more knowledge in this area.

DISCLAIMER:
This writing is not intended to hurt anybody or their image as a whole but to bring the reality into picture. I urge the readers not to take it personally if they came across such a situation in their life ever. Let’s avoid all kind of controversy and view things as learning opportunities. I have not mentioned any name here for that reason. I will be happy if they can provide me with their valuable comments for better understanding and better writing.Let me know if you find this content objectionable and if so why? Do share with me if you have similar experiences. I may add something to it later after I find your comments.

 

* First published at http://writersatchatterati.blogspot.in/ on Thursday, 14 February 2008